I'm afraid that I will forget how to dream and fantasize.
To wonder and still believe in magic, miracles, and romance.
I'm afraid that if I embrace the realistic world too much, I will lose that part oft self.
In the nights, I will feel empty but yet can't figure out what's wrong an lacking in my life.
Ephemeral things like these are easy to forget, like memories of a dream hovering on the edge of your consciousness.
Knowing that you have forgotten something, almost realizing what it is but can never recall. And in time, you just leave it be and going on with your mundane existence, much like Neo before he discovered the Matrix;
when waking feels like dreaming, and being in a dream feeling more alive than when awake.
Maybe sometimes, the road to heaven leads through hell.
But if I must traverse through, I don't wish to forget who I really am, or who I really wish to be.
At the least, I want to remember who I am once again, even after I have lost myself along the way.
I will gather and make a list of things, memories, and keep it aside.
Like a time capsule.
For my future self to recover and go over it.
A list of things that will remind me who I've loved, what I've loved.
Words, stories, movies, characters that I find beautiful, touching, inspirational.
Qualities of character I desire to have.
Songs that moved me.
Sensations...
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